She
by vilannh
Summary: What would Eric do after his marriage to Freyda is over and who would be there to turn to?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Hi everyone. I am not finished with The Call yet but it is coming to an end and this story has been floating around in my head so I decided to go ahead and post it. I hope you guys like it. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters that right goes to Charlaine Harris as we all know.**

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**She**

**Chapter 1**

I am finally free. Well, one more night and I can put all of this behind me. This has been the longest and most trying 100 years of my existence.

My "wife" has been trying for the last 20 years to get me to renew our marriage contract, but to no avail. I refuse to spend any more time than I am contractually obligated.

I watch as her minions pack up the room that has been my prison for the last 50 years. As I look around my personal hell I sigh. I have moved countless times, restarted my life, my identity more times then I remember, but this is the first time I am feel lost and it is all because of _her_.

100 years ago my maker died, my child distrusted me, and the love off my long life broke our tie to me. _She_ was the cause of all these events. When _she_saved the shifter instead of our marriage that was the final straw.

Ok, so technically _she_ didn't kill my maker, but _her_ people did with the original target being _her_. Though he was a cruel maker, he was my father. He taught me how to be the vampire I am today. I admit his methods were questionable, but they worked. I guess you could say that a bit of resentment towards _her_ started that night. With everything that was going on I never really had time to grieve him and get over the initial anger that developed for _her_. _She_freed me of a tyrant and to repay her I grew cold and distant.

When _she_ broke the bond we had was another step up the resentment ladder. _She_ did not even talk to me first. I am not saying I would have agreed with it, but I would have been in a better state of mind to understand the reasoning behind _her_ action. Of course, that was too much to ask of _her_. _She_ would never know what it felt like waking thinking _she_ was gone. That I had once again failed to save _her_ and _she_finally paid the ultimate price, but no she just needed to confirm that her love was real and not blood.

The insecurities of my ex-wife when it came to her feelings amazed me. Here was a woman that could be beaten, raped, staked, and tortured, yet _she_ was scared of her own feelings. _She_ ran from them like they were on fire, which in a way would be incorrect for her, because _she_didn't even run from fire. At the time, it just increased the anger that had started eating at me.

_She_ wasn't really to fault for the rift between my child and me either, but that black hole of resentment told me _she_ was. Pam had always been a stubborn child. That was no different. What had changed was her loyalty, before Pam would not dream of sharing information with anyone, let alone a human. I understood that _she_ was Pam's favorite breather, but vampires always came first and me as her master came before all, including herself. Pam's loyalty had always been absolute.

The fight we had in _her_ kitchen was the first ever. Pam and I had argued and I have had to strike my child for punishment before, but she always submitted like a proper child. That night in the kitchen she bit, scratched, and hit back all my advances on her. Pam's determination to let _her_know what my maker had trapped me in was unheard of. After Muriel's death my precious child changed. She was cold to everyone including me. Her pity for my wife grew. When I made the choice to honor the contract presented to me, Pam could stand no more. She stayed by my side for the first year then told me of her desire to leave. I saw her 50 years ago and not since. Supposedly she is happy as a second to a sheriff in England. I am glad that she is happy. I made the choice not to disturb her life. I know that every child needs their freedom. If she ever called me I would still help her and if she ever chose to return to me I would welcome her with open arms.

The night that Niall contacted me and informed me of the Cluvial Dor I knew we had a chance. _She_ just had to wish to stay mine. Do you think she did? No _she_ did not. Yes, I was growing cold towards _her_ and yes, I was not the best husband in the world, but _she_ was not the ideal wife either. At the time, I truly believed that one wish was all _she_had to do. Everything else we could work out, but to do that we needed to be together.

That night she saved the shifter was all I needed to see. She put her friend above me. It was the final piece to my dark anger puzzle. I met with the Queen signed the contracts and was done with it all.

Breaking the pledge was the equivalent to a human divorce. I left a hefty settlement for my ex-wife. I was hurt and mad, but I wanted _her_ cared for. I knew that _she_ would not waist it or spend it frivolously if I could get _her_to take it.

I made sure that I was not accessible, nor any of my people when the check was delivered. Surprisingly, it was not returned. None of my retinue was contacted. Nothing was mailed back. No matter what the reason, _she_decided to keep the 4 million dollars and 4 properties, 1 in Key West, 1 in Canada, 1 in Mexico, and 1 in Sweden. I also included the upkeep costs that have always been used for the maintenance of those properties.

A year after our "divorce" _she_ left. I quietly asked around for information about _her_. _Her_ family and friends said _she_ chose to see the world. _She_ told them _she_ was tired of being around so many bad memories. _Her_ brother confirmed that _she_ just needed time. He said _she_ did not just vanish. _She_ called him regularly, _she_ called all of them. _She_ sent cards and presents every holiday and birthday. _She_ gave _her_share of the bar back to Sam and set up a trust for Jason.

My smart fairy knew I would keep an eye on _her_ through the staff on the properties. So _she_ fired them all and hired new ones loyal to only _her_. All were human no doubt so _she_ could continually monitor them. I know I could have been more persistent about following _her_ movements if I wanted to, but in a way I wanted _her_to have peace.

I hated that _she_ was living her dream without me. Worse, it was because _she_ chose to. All of my contacts in the world reported no harm had come to _her_. So _she_succeeded in getting away from all the supernatural bullshit.

As much as I hated _her_I could not leave Louisiana. I stayed for the same reason she left, the memories. I visited Oklahoma yearly as obligation. Other than that I went about existing as I always had.

I know that I secretly hoped _she_ would return. I hoped _she_ would somehow heal the darkness in me as _she_ had in the past. I held on to that hope for decades. I watched _her_ brother marry, have children, and age. I knew he and his family took trips once or twice a year to see _her_. At least, that is what I am to believe. Their trips were always to one of the four properties she received. I may not have monitored _her_, but I did them.

I made myself believe that _she_ was happy to know that the trust _she_ set up helped _her_ brother and his family strive. When Jason and Michelle started having kids they moved into the old farmhouse. Jason and Alcide partnered up changing the business from Herveaux and Son to Herveaux and Stackhouse. _Her_ brother truly did grow up and make something of himself. All four of his kids went to college and became successful themselves. I knew that would make _her _happy and ultimately that was what I wanted.

Even if it was not with me.

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**A/N: So let me know what you think any review is welcome. This is a multi-chapter so there will be more.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I have to say a huge THANK YOU SOO MUCH for your faves, alerts, and taking the time to review.**

**Now I have to ask you readers to have faith in me here. This will not be a very long story I think maybe 6 or 7 chapters and I have most of them done already. I also wanted to say that I labeled this an Eric and Sookie story for a reason so PLEASE PLEASE trust me.**

**Disclaimer: I own none of it. It is Charlaine Harris' and Allan Balls' and I have no Beta so the mistakes are mine.**

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**She**

**Chapter 2**

So, still wondering how I ended up sitting here watching my belongings be gently boxed up. What finally made me move to Oklahoma and become the true husband Freyda longed for? I am getting to that.

They say time heals all wounds and in some ways I believe that. My time alone in Louisiana made me see many truths.

After _she_ left, then Pam left, I carried on. I fed and fucked when my body required it. I was nowhere near the vampire sex god I was before _her. _I was old so I did not require it often much to the disappointment of the many fang bangers of my past.I ruled my area the way De Castro required of me. Through all my actions I still missed my ex-wife. I was angry that she abandoned me. At least that was the way I saw it. First, when she saved the shifter. Then _she _did it again when she left Louisiana. She may have been part fairy, but she was mostly human. She was supposed to be broken-hearted. _She _was supposed to be depressed and eat massive amounts of chocolate ice cream. Then she was supposed to come to me begging me to take her back, but she didn't. She just left.

When I started to watch Jason's marriage and growth it made me realize I had made many mistakes. For a long time I blamed _her_. It was all _her_ fault in my eyes. _She_ did this to me. _She_ made me this way. _She_took the things I used to find joy in and tainted them.

Amazingly Jason, of all people, being a devoted husband showed me my errors. I saw in him what _she_would have expected of me. The way he looked after his wife, the way he loved her, communicated with her, let her make choices, treated her with respect and made her an equal in all things forced me to ask myself if I did that.

I knew that our marriage was not the ceremony Jason and his wife shared. I knew that _she_ got tricked into it by me, but maybe if I would have given _her_ a human ceremony after the pledging _she_ would have recognized me as _hers_. If I would have talked to her instead of waited for _her _to come to me and ask, maybe if I would told _her_ that I would be a proper husband it would have appealed to _her_ southern sensibilities, maybe if I would have just asked _her_ to marry me instead of tricked _her_ then it might have been different. I knew _she _wanted that. I was just too selfish to provide any of that.

I have never had any regrets until _her_. Realizing all the mistakes made by both of us healed the darkness in me. As it healed I started to run through every second of my time with _her_. I started spotting all the things we did wrong, both _her _and I.

Sometimes, I pushed too hard. Sometimes, I didn't push hard enough. _She_ was stubborn. I was high handed. The loyalty that _she_ showed me _she_ showed to all, but I couldn't see that. I should have respected _her_ loyalty. I should have praised her for having something that few these days give freely as she did. Her loyalty was from her heart. It was not given from fear or because she wanted something in return. It was given because she cared for you and if she cared she gave all of herself. Instead I cursed _her_ for it. My selfishness saw _her_ save another man instead of me with _her_ wish, but it could have been anyone in _her_ circle and _she_ would have done the same. Would I have turned my back on her if it was her brother laying there dying? No, I wouldn't have, but because it was the shifter I treated it differently. I did not trust in _her_ love for me enough to know that it was just her way of saving a friend. The way she saved all of us countless times.

She broke the bond without any discussion with me and in return I broke the pledge without any discussion with _her_. Was I any better than _her_? The answer was no, no I wasn't.

_She_ should have been the first one I turned to during it all. _She_ should have been the first I talked to, but I being a vampire sheriff would not lower my superiority to lean on her. I told myself it was for her safety, but it was not. Even Pam knew that the more information she had the safer she would have been, but I couldn't take the time to tell her. I couldn't bring myself to be honest with the one person I should have. It was because I made myself believe that she would not understand. My insecurities as a man not a vampire did us in. I truly believed that if I told her she would just leave me for some other mate and if lying would keep her next to me then that was what I needed to do.

_She _hated her freedom of choice taken from her and that was exactly what I did. By not telling her all the information I did not let her make an informed decision of what she wanted to do. I made it for her by only giving her the information that would have her stay with me. I hated it when she had information that she did not share with me. Like when the curse of the bitch witch was broken and I had no memories. I continuously harassed her for the details. I even went as far as blackmailing her into giving me the information. I was desperate to know. Yet, I shared nothing with her. I hid details that were far more important than if we fucked or not from her. Equality was never shown in our relationship.

All the inner musing over the years made me keep hope. I did not care what age she would be when she returned I would be here.

Why didn't I go to her you are probably wondering. Well, through my musing I figured out that many of her pain was caused by us, vampires. If she was able to find peace then I would not be the one to disturb it. I was a patient man. I just knew at some point _she_ would return. Even if it was just a visit, _she_would return.

What I wasn't expecting was the manner of which _she _did.

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**A/N: so what did you think...let me know and like I said please trust me.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I do not own any of this it is owned by Charlaine Harris and Allan Ball**

**Thank you once again for all the reviews, faves, and alerts. The story is done totaling 8 chapters so the updates will be daily I think.**

**I loved seeing how you all thought she would return. So here it is...**

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**She**

**Chapter 3**

50 years I had waited, I had contemplated everything, I had hurt, I had regretted, I had hoped.

50 years gone.

That night I rose, as usual. I dressed, as usual. I went to the club, as usual. It was a Monday so it was sheriff business, as usual. I sat in my office and waited for my first appointment, as usual.

What was not usual was my bond with Pam. It was strong and racked with grief and sadness. She entered my office with tears streaking her face.

I knew immediately what had caused her this pain. Only one thing would cause her to return here and in the state she was in. I didn't want to believe what she was about to tell me. My heart though cold and dead refused to believe her words.

"She is gone from us Master" she sobbed.

When the shock of her statement subsided Pam told me the house in Sweden burned down three days ago. _She_ was sleeping and did not wake. _She _burned or suffocated first. That is what they suspected.

The first action I thought of was to call Jason. He confirmed it and told me he was burying _her_ashes in two nights. He knew she had many vampire friends in the surrounding area that might want to come so he was having a night ceremony. He had planned on calling me tomorrow night to let me know about the service. I offered to pay for it all. At first he said no, but then realized I needed closure as he did and this would help me.

I made sure her headstone said:

_Loyal friend, Loving sister, and Faithful wife_.

_She_ had never remarried, but _she_was a faithful wife to me and if in death was the only way I could honor it then that was how I would.

Pam came to show her respect for her friend. I learned that they spoke on the phone often, but never met up again. The night after the funeral Pam returned to England. She still held me responsible for many of the things that happen all those years ago. I knew she needed to heal and so I wished her well and let her go once again.

With _her_ returned to _her _home I made the decision to move to Oklahoma. There was no reason for me to stay. Freyda had begged for years to have me at her side. With my hope and heart buried six feet under in Bon Temps cemetery I decided to go.

I finally understood why my love left. Before _her _death all the memories of the area comforted me in a way. To see the places that we shared used to put a smile on my face, but no longer. Now they held pain. Knowing that we would never share any of those spaces again made my chest ache. The places included her home, my home, and my office. I could not get away from them where I was, so I decided to leave them. I sold the club and all my other business holdings to Felipe and turned in my resignation. He understood about it all. Of course I didn't tell him my true reasons for leaving, but you would have to be an idiot not to see why.

Oklahoma offered a safe haven from the memories so I took it. Freyda tried her best to be a companion and she was. We had a true vampire marriage. She did not need nor want love, sex yes, but not love. She required loyalty and arm candy. I had no problem giving that to her. She was a powerful and just queen. She had ruled for centuries and her kingdom had no concerns out of the normal ones a kingdom has. We attended balls, conferences, and other social events together.

Freyda and I held court together. We shared a bed. We shared donors. It was mechanical most of the time. Her Majesty knew I was just going through the motions until my contract was done. She tried to give me blood spiked with fairy, but found it angered me more then helped me. The spiked blood reminded me of _her _and pissed me off rather than intoxicated me.

After that she accepted what this marriage truly was, a political scam. We did not have personal conversations like I did with _her_. We did not share intimate moments, soft touches, hell; we only kissed when donor blood dripped from our mouths and there was no passion involved in them. Even though we slept in the same bed we never touched unless there was a donor between us or it was my yearly duty. I never laid a kiss on her forehead, never sniffed her hair, or held her hand. I could not even tell you if she had a distinct smell other than the normal vampire smell we all have. I didn't know nor care what her favorite… anything was. I gave her gifts when the occasion called for it. What those gifts were I had no idea. My day servant purchased them and made sure I had them to present. The only thing I made sure My Queen did not have, was _her _kind of perfume.

As the marriage and years progressed I grew weary. I did all that was required of me, but it did not wash away the ache. When we attended conferences were the worst. Vampires like Russell and Bart looked at me with pity in their eyes. Having a true match marriage they knew what it was like to love your mate. They knew that my true mate had died and felt sorry for me. I hated their pity. Though they never spoke of it, it was there in their sad glances when I sat alone not wanting to be bothered. Even more so knowing that I had not been there to witness _her_ death or be by _her_ side when she died. I was not there to save _her_ from fire that took _her_ from all of us. _She_ may have been old, but that did not mean _she _would not have had many years left on this earth. With the end of the marriage I longed for solitude.

So Sweden here I come.

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**A/N: *ducks and runs for cover* Remember I told you to trust me...let me know what you think even if it is filled with cussing please. I might post the next chapter later today or tonight not sure yet. What do you guys want?**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: So here is the next chapter a lot of you asked for hope you enjoy it and once again thank you.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own any of it Charlaine Harris does. Oh and so does Allan Ball**

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**She**

**Chapter 4**

When I first received the invite from Stellan to join his kingdom I was skeptical about it. He was a good acquaintance of mine. He was actually a Viking like me just from a neighboring village. He was roughly the same age as me. It was my homeland, but it was also where _she_died. I was unsure about being able to be there.

I knew I was not staying in Oklahoma or returning to Louisiana. Bill Compton was now regent there and I defiantly would not answer to that asshat ever again. Actually, no state appealed to me. England was out. I didn't want Pam to feel I was watching over her. I hated Russia and Asia was just too populated for my taste right now. I considered another one of my islands in the Keys, but that much seclusion was not exactly what I wanted either.

So Stellan's offer looked pretty good. I considered changing my name back to Leif as it was my name when I was in Europe before, but after some thought I decided against it. I was too well known by Eric Northman so no point in trying to change that now.

I made one last stop in Louisiana. It was necessary to say goodbye. I hadn't stood on this ground, in front of this stone in fifty years. Jason, his wife, and two of his children lay beside her now. I paid my respect to the man who made me see all my errors and the woman who would forever hold my heart.

I doubted that I would ever return here. The Stackhouse line was strong and well cared for. When _she_ died everything _she _had went to her brother, but with his success with Alcide it only added to their now tremendous fortune. Both men were lucky enough to have children and grandchildren carry on their legacy. Staring at the line I took such an interest in made me realize that there truly was nothing left in America for me.

Sweden was refreshing. Winter always soothed me. My love for the cold and long nights made me wonder why I ever chose to move to the south.

I stayed in Stellan's court for a few nights before I decided to make the trip to my, well _her_ former house. I owned many houses and flats in this country, but the one I gave to _her _was my home. All the houses I gave_ her_ were my homes. Places I always loved, that I built with my own hands and they were places I felt at peace most.

I knew that without _her_ I would never feel that peace again, but giving them to _her_ so long ago gave me a small sense of joy. Knowing that _she _would find happiness in them gave me happiness even if it wasn't with me.

On my third night at court His Majesty began telling me stories of my wife. I was unaware that _she_ was friendly with any vampires. Stellan told me that _she_ came to him when she first arrived in country. _She_ made him aware of who _she_ was and what _she_ was. He said _she_ did not want any conflict with anyone and figured he would find out about _her_ soon enough. _She_ had heard that he was a fair King so _she _felt safe approaching him.

The King spoke of her beauty, intellect, and kindness. _She_ offered _her_ gift as a service and was a regular at court. Before I could wonder if the King was able to seduce _her_ he informed me of his inability to be _her_ lover. Never had he met a woman with such restraint he laughed as he told me. Nothing could woo _her_ to his bed or side. He had developed nothing but respect for his liten älva, as he called _her_.

I felt a bit of jealousy towards him. He got to laugh with _her_, talk to _her_, and just spend time with _her_. _She_ was a regular guest at the palace. He met _her_ family. _She _attended balls, sometimes as his "date". All of these things I had to give up to be married to Oklahoma. All the things I had let go because of my stupidity.

_She_ told him of our relationship and many of the adventures we had, if you could call them that. He was amazed that _she_ was able to live through all of that. _She_ was a warrior in his eyes. He told me that _she_ loved me until the day _she_ died. I wondered if _she_ had ever taken other lovers so I asked. Stellan said _she_ did, but nothing more than physical pleasure he was sure of it. He stated that none of her affairs had ever been to _her_ home. Stellan and his first child were the only ones _she_ had ever given the honor of being _her_ guests. He said that none of the men lasted more than a week or two. Mainly when _she_ had business here at the palace for a great length of time was when _she_ found someone to occupy _her_ time with. _Her_ heart was locked away and only one vampire held the key was how he put it. It was not for lack of trying by _her_ lovers. He informed me that _she_ did not take many, but they all loved _her_.

Hearing that _she_ had others also caused jealousy to bubble up in me. I don't know why exactly. I did not expect her to commit to a life of celibacy. Gods knew I didn't, but imagining another man touching _her_ hurt. I would guess it hurt me as much as it had hurt _her_ to see me touching another. At least I did not have to bear witness to it as _she_ did with me. Yet, another error in the long list of ways I wronged _her_.

After gaining a wealth of knowledge about my wife from the King I informed him I would be leaving court. The King knew where I intended to go and he knew that I would be in seclusion for some time after that. He asked that after I had taken some time to myself if I would come to the annual Lords Ball. I hated political functions. I was no longer obligated to attend them having retired, but he wanted me to meet his new child. He said she was still young and currently traveling, but she never missed the Ball. He told me she would love to meet me as she was from America it would be refreshing to have someone that understood her better there.

I didn't want to attend, knowing that I would not feel like socializing after seeing where _she _perished, but he was my king now. I did not want to disrespect him either. I could understand how his child wanted someone familiar; after all it was how Stellan and I became friends. I believe that is why he requested it of me. So, I agreed to be at his ball and meet his "baby Falk". I found it endearing how he referred to his youngest child. She must have taken his surname when she was turned as they were the same and since he said she was American I could only assume that she was not of his human bloodline. Not to mention that he did that with all his children. Each of them carried the surname he went by at the time of their turning. Falk has been his last name for the last 150 years so she could not be that old, but old enough to allow her to travel on her own. If I had to guess she was probably around 120. I bid him goodbye as I would be leaving at the next sundown and not be able to see him before I left.

The next night and the nights to follow were going to be rough.

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**There you have it...let me know what you think**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: thank you all for your wonderful reviews, faves, and alerts.**

**Disclaimer I do not own any of this that belongs to Charlaine Harris and Allan Ball**

**So nothing important to say up here enjoy...**

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**She**

**Chapter 5**

Arriving at my home, _her _former home was bittersweet. Some remnants of a house still remained, though barely noticeable due to the fire and years wear on it. No one had stepped foot on this land since her death according to Stellan. Even after 50 years I could still see some of her belongings, like they had been frozen in time.

Two wives I have lost here. First, I lost Aude in child birth. Then I lost _her _in fire. It is kind of ironic that they should both die on this land. It was almost the same spots. Maybe this land is cursed to take my woman away from me.

About 20 years ago I requested to buy this land back from the Stackhouses. They had no problem transferring the land back to me. They did not even sale it back. They just signed it over claiming none of the family comes here since her death. They were also instructed by Jason that if I should ever request any of my land back it was to be signed back over to me immediately. He really was a great man.

I planned to rebuild the house just as it had been. I can imagine her living here. Even in her elder years I imagine she enjoyed the peace. I can imagine her relaxing on the porch either basking in the sun or staring at the stars. Though it would be a new house it will be identical to the one _she_ found such joy in.

I had excavators come in first to find anything that could be _hers_. Many household items are found that I disregard, but some of her jewelry is found and restored. Those I kept. Every piece that was brought to me I imagine _her_ wearing. There were necklaces that lay on _her_ smooth neck, earrings that hung from the lobes that I used to nibble, bracelets that adorned _her_ petite wrist, and rings gracing _her_ delicate fingers. Whether they were rich jewels or simple chains I have them preserved as though they are the crown jewels.

Many nights I just wonder the land. I can see my lover doing the same. At some points I believe I am going mad. Visions of us together enjoying the night danced around in my head.

As the house developed I can see _her_ in the different rooms. I see the life we could have had together. I can see _her_ making _her_ dinner in the kitchen, _her_ bundled up in the library enjoying a book, I wonder if _she_ ever got over reading those romance novels, and most of all I can see us making love in front of the fireplace. I could see _her_ beautiful body lying out on furs. I know that when _she_ died _she_ was in her 80's, but I can't picture her any other way then the young vibrant girl who drove me crazy in Louisiana. Maybe if I would have seen _her_ age, as I had seen Jason, I would see _her_ differently, but I never did. Even at _her_ funeral Jason chose pictures of a young girl. He said that it was because that is how the people would remember _her_ since they hadn't seen _her_ since _she_ left.

I paid millions to have the house rebuilt within the month that I would be there. Since there were some vamps on the construction crew things went extremely quick. It was actually finished the night before I had to leave for the palace. Spending the night in _her_ house for the first time in 100 years was sentimental at best. Everything was the same, but different almost wrong. _Her_ scent was not there. _Her_ personal touch was gone. Nothing in this house was _hers_. I had _her_ jewels placed in the bedroom, but that made no difference. When I laid in the bed that we would have shared it was cold and empty.

I thought rebuilding would help me, it did not. I knew that it would be hard being here, but not this beyond what I imagined. For the first time I allowed myself to shed the tears _her_ death deserved. All these years I found it weak to cry especially in front of humans. Not saying that I haven't cried, just not very often and other than the death of my maker _she_ was the last one that I cried to or about . The funeral had too many others around for me shed any. My heart ached for years for me to mourn _her_, but I did not let myself. I took a page out of my lovers' book and ran from my feelings. Yet here, in the place she spent the majority of _her_ years away from me I could not run any more. I clutched the pillow that _her_ head would have laid and sobbed, soaking it with blood tears. Maybe this was what I needed to finally clear _her_ from my system. Maybe life could be sweeter again for me. I doubted it.

I had heard many stories about ancient vampires meeting the sun. I never knew what could drive them to give up such an existence, but for the first time I did. It was not the loneliness that comes from time to time. It is the emptiness that comes from losing what means most to us.

Lose is a normal thing when you are a vampire. It is the reason we do not attach ourselves to humans. Well, we do attach to humans, but most of the times they become are children. We care for them, teach them, but love them; not normally. Yet, they are the closest that we come to love. I have learned that to truly love someone it is the art of letting them go that means the most. Whether it is letting them leave you to find their own happiness or burying them in the ground after a lifetime of having them by your side that is love.

That lose is what vampires fear most. When Michelle died my spies reported watching Jason mourn, but he knew that he would follow soon behind and believed that they would find each other in the afterlife. So the loss was not that bad for him. He died within a year after his wife. For us it is not that simple, we live forever. We carry on forever. We are evil incarnate. There was no way that I would be meeting _her_ in the afterlife. So if we fall deeply in love with a human that chooses not to stay with us forever living on is almost too hard to bear. I now do not judge those that have chosen to meet the sun, for this reason, as cowards.

Honestly, what kept me from meeting the sun this night was the thought of disappointing _her_. _She_ would want me to continue on. I knew that _she_ had talked to Godfrey in Dallas all those years ago when he decided to meet the sun. What their conversation was I never knew, but I did know that _she_ did not like that he was committing suicide and _she_ refuse to let him die alone. _She_ always believed that there was something to live for. So even though the thought crossed my mind I could not take the action. Somewhere in my mind I believed that _she_ was watching down on me and I could not hurt _her_ once again by leaving this life even if it meant me having to find a way to get over _her_ or at least learn to live on my own again.

Maybe the Lord's Ball would be good for me to attend. At least it would be a distraction to my pity party.

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**A/N: so the next chapter we get to meet Stellan's children...Yay. Let me know what you think. I am not good on sitting on finished chapters so I may post another chapter today. I am not sure yet...I may be able to be swayed hehe**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thank you once again for all the reviews, faves, and alerts. **

**So here is the next chapter. There is only 2 left I have to admit the last two are longer then any of the other ones. I might post them tonight because like I said I am not good at sitting on finished chapters. I don't know how other authors do it. So I am really considering just posting the whole thing by the end of tonight.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own it Charlaine Harris and Allan Ball do**

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**She**

**Chapter 6**

Ugh...I thought the Ball would help take my mind off her, but now I think I may be wrong. When I arrived at the palace tonight it was busy with staff preparing. I was escorted to a different wing then before as Stellan's children where all here taking the rooms I usually stayed in.

I ran into Nora Hansson, Stellan's third child, after I was settled in. She was English and we had shared some time together right after she was turned. I guess you could say I was babysitting while Stellan handled some business that he did not feel a baby vamp should be involved in. Since I had a baby of my own and could not join him he asked if I could watch over her. I agreed and she traveled with Pam and me for about 20 years before returning to her "pappa" and brothers.

Nora was normally quite flirty with me, but not this time. It was strange. I dismissed it as her having little time as she was helping with the organizing off the ball or perhaps it was pity again as she had probably known _her_. I wasn't in the mood to find out. I actually welcomed her uninterest. It meant I did not have to turn her down or upset her with a no. We spoke of simple things then she excused herself to continue with the set-up.

"Northman, have you met our baby Falk yet?" she asked as she was leaving the room. I shook my head no to her and she giggled at me.

When Johan Stefansson, the Kings first child, offered to take me out on the town I thought it would be a nice relief. We met up with his little brother Walter at a vampire club in town. The twins, as they were known because they were made within a year of each other, were very popular in the club. With the three of us together fang bangers begged us for attention. Walter was the first to pick three women and go to one of the private feeding rooms.

I took the chance to talk to Johan alone. Though they were only a year apart Johan was far more mature than Walter. You would not think that they were both around 800 years old.

"Do you know why Nora would ask me about your sister?" I asked

"Our baby? I do not know why she asked. If you would have met here I highly doubt you would be out with us two knuckle heads tonight." He smirked and laughed

I rolled my eyes and asked "Why would that be?"

"Let's just say she is definitely your type."

"I am not interested in babies" I snorted out. Nora and Pam were the last babies I entertained. They are much too needy as I remember.

"We call her baby because she is the youngest of us and we are all protective of her, but she is 97 years dead. As a matter of fact the ball is her dead night. I almost forgot, shit. She had a hard life as a human so we all try to make her undead life the best we can. Especially Pappa, he more than everyone insists she be well looked after. I have to say I believe she is his favorite. Don't tell Walter I said that; although I think he may already know." his answer sounded like a stern warning even though it was accompanied with a playful wink.

I just shrugged at him and drank my blood. I don't know what the royal family was in such a huff about. Just because I was no longer married and my love had died so long ago did not mean I immediately wanted another mate. Maybe my friends just wanted me to stop moping. Vampires have never really been my favorite choice of lovers. The way that they were so protective of their "baby" I wouldn't dare take the chance. Yet, they all wanted me to meet her. I was really dreading meeting her to be honest. I have learned that vamps that have been changed since the great reveal tend to be more trouble than they are worth. They didn't understand hardship the way us older vamps did. Most of them were made by their choice, not because they were chosen by the vamp. Most of them were able to stay in contact with their mortal family and a lot of them were also able to stay in their place of making. Some even keeping the job and family they had as a human. They did not have to move around every so many years, they did not have to reinvent themselves; all they had to do was be made and register. Child vamps were spoiled by all the new laws supes had to follow now. The hell that I and many ancients went through with our makers was not even possible. I mean yes we were still able to punish our children and if we were in power our subjects also, but rules and regulations prevented making an unwilling human a vampire. It also prevented us from changing humans without regent or monarchs approval. It was a form of population control that both the human and vampire government enjoyed. That was my thoughts on babies and at 97 years dead she was a baby to me.

I watched the patrons of the club as I used to in Fangtasia. None of the humans caught my eye. When Johan found his entertainment for the night I decided to call it a night. I was still raw from being on my land and did not want any company. Most places that served blood had a selection of donor blood to choose from now. That filled me just fine. Don't get it wrong I still loved it directly from the source, but after what I had been feeling I did not want the hassle of a donor.

Court had already been dismissed as it was called to an end early due to the ball. Stellan was now holding a private court to handle any problems his sheriffs where having since they were all here. So there wasn't anything for me to do. I headed to my rooms and decided reading was going to be my entertainment for the night. The peace and quiet would be nice. I was sure that tomorrow would be horrible. Socializing with the élite of the kingdom was not exactly on my to-do list at the moment.

About fifteen minutes before dawn my mind began to wonder again. Thoughts of _her _played in my mind. They were always thoughts of _her_. I could have sworn I heard _her_laugh through the halls. Not wanting to go on a wild goose chase and look insane to the people in the palace. I lay down and prepared for dawn to take me.

I think I really am losing it.

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**A/N: As always let me know what you think of Stellan's children or anything for that matter...**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: I know I said that I would post this earlier, but I went to lay down for a bit and my nap lasted longer then I expected. So once again thank you for all the readers of this story.**

**Disclaimer:I don't own these characters Charlaine Harris and Allan Ball do.**

**So the time has come to answer most your questions I hope.**

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**She**

**Chapter 7**

_**Her POV**_

97 years I have waited. I didn't really think that I would be around to wait for it, but one thing I learned is can't plan everything in life. I'm not sure that waited is correct word. I mean it was always in the back of my mind that I would now be able to see _him _again, but the real question was did I want to.

My life was nowhere near what I had planned as a little girl. I mean I knew it wouldn't be a normal life, but when vampires came out I thought some type of normalcy was possible. I knew I wasn't the only freak out there. When I met my first one and couldn't hear them I had real hope. The more supes I learned about the more I hoped I could have a good life. Boy was I wrong.

I had a crazy life once vamps and supes entered it. I know that I can take the blame for some of the things. There many times I took a right when I should have turned left, but there wasn't much I could do once it was done.

Although, I had been through a lot the biggest blow was my "divorce". When _he_ decided to end our marriage because I saved a friend from DYING and not _him_ from a MARRIAGE I was done. _He_ did not fight for me and if _he_ was _he_ sure as hell wasn't telling me. It was bad enough the way _he_ acted when I caught _him_ in _his_ room with the fairy laced Were bitch, even if she was set up to be there. I wasn't sure what _he_ wanted from me at that point. Did _he_ expect me to sit around and be the other woman? Was I supposed to kiss _him_ goodbye and be all "see you when you get back from fucking your wife"? If _he_ did I guess _he_ did not know me at all. I wouldn't accept being a kept woman why the hell would _he_ think I would be _his_ mistress. Yup we were through and that broke my heart. Realizing there was no saving us was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life.

Now, I know that I broke the bond between us without saying anything to _him_, but may I claim ignorance here. I knew very little about it and the person that should have explained it to me wasn't. _He_ claimed that it saved me from André, but with André dead why did we need it. Oh that's right, because it protected me from other vamps, a little fact that would have been nice to know before I broke it. We had talked about some things, but in the scheme of things the things he shared with me was very little. To be honest with you, the feelings that I got when _his_ maker showed up scared me. It was painful to feel them and I didn't like not having control of my own head. I just needed to have me in my head. It was bad enough having every person's thoughts in a two-mile radius in my head. I really didn't want anyone's feelings there. I'm a telepath I did not want to add empath of my husband's bloodline to that title.

The day the check came along with deeds to different properties I was livid. It was bad enough when Bill tried to pension me off, but now _him_. _He_ saw how hurt I was when that happen shit; _he_ was the one that came and told me. Jason was the one that talked me into taking it without argument. He told me that I wasn't really the best wife to _him_ and I didn't even really recognize the marriage so why was I so mad about the divorce. He reminded me that _he_ was 1000 years old. What _he_ handed over to me was more than likely a drop in a bucket when it came to _his_ worth. Jason was a little upset that _he_ thought so little of me. The way I treated the marriage would have made Gran turn in her grave. He reminded me that as independent as Gran was she was also a devoted wife that let Granddaddy take care of his family the way a man should. Something I never let _him _do ever even if it could have saved me some grief and injuries. Gran was a housewife that did not work a job outside the house. Yes, I got my stubbornness from her, but I never considered that by my own rules Gran was a kept woman. Not high price kept, but kept all the same. Don't get me wrong she did all the housework, cooked, and raised the children, but by the standards I held _him _to my Gran would have been considered kept.

So I decided that my brother was right and I took it without question. With that much money in the bank I felt wrong taking shifts from women that needed the money to support a family. I told Sam that I was retiring. I signed my half if the bar back over to him. He didn't want to take it at first, but when I told him he either took it or I would give it to Jase he took it. I met with an investment manager to make sure my money lasted. He also helped me set up a trust for Jason since he and Michelle were starting a family.

I moped around my house for about a year and just went through the motions of everyday life. Then Jason found out that Michelle was pregnant again just 4 months after their first was born and the memories of everything that had happened in the old farmhouse got to be too much for me. I informed my brother that they could move in to the farmhouse for more space and I was going to travel. I always wanted to so instead of sitting on my gold like a dragon I decided to use it.

The first trips I made where to the properties that were given to me by _him_. The staff _he_ had caring for the properties were very loyal to _him_. That didn't bother me so much, but their mean thoughts on how I was not worthy to have the properties were. I refused to be surrounded by people who constantly thought about _him_. So I fired them all and hired new employees. They were people that did not know anything about the previous owner. I made sure they were honest and hardworking deserving of the money that was paid to them and trust me they were well paid.

I had saved my last trip to the house in Sweden. It was beautiful. The land was massive and peaceful. It was near the water, yet surrounded by woods. I felt more at home in this house than anywhere else I had been. I loved the area and the people were so friendly.

When the first snow came I wanted to run back to the Keys as fast as I could, but I stayed and learned the beauty of a true white Christmas. I decided that this is where I would settle down. The other houses were nice for a visit, but this one just felt like it fit. There was so much of _him_ in it.

Once I learned the language I was able to understand the thoughts of people and what they thought about King Stellan. They all liked him and he was very in touch with the humans of his kingdom not just the vampires. I learned that he even took strolls among all the people and not planned with security all around him, I mean just leisurely strolls around the cities. I felt confident that I could trust him. I was technically also a Supe so I wanted to check in and let him know I was there. I did not want to take the chance of accidentally being attacked and starting an inter-species war. I mean let's face it I'm not the luckiest person when it comes to trouble.

When I met him he was everything the people thought and more. He was funny and liked to laugh and joke. He held court every night to be close to his people. He was handsome of course and don't think he didn't know it. I met his first child Johan about 6 months after I had been here. He was the most serious of them all, but he still knew how to enjoy himself. Walter and Nora were the next of his children I met. Walter was all about fun, but he was caring and very protective. We spent many nights dancing on bars. Nora told me about the time she spent with _him_ and Pam when she was a baby. She said that the Viking had always been a selfish arse and not to read too much into it. She was also the one that told me Pam was away from _him_ and currently living in England. Nora contacted Pam to see if she would take a call from me and not tell _him_ about it. Pam seemed almost happy to talk to me again. We spoke a lot though never met up again she was quite busy with her new duties. It was nice having her back in my life.

After getting to know them so well I offered my telepathy to them as a service. None of them asked or demanded it of me. It was nice to have the choice to give use of my curse for once and not be intimidated into it. The King accepted my offer as long as that is what I wanted to do.

He was easy to work for and he even let me use one of his apartments in the city whenever I did come to work for him. It was nice and I was glad to not always have to be at the palace. Johan's day man, Wilhelm, was the first lover I had taken after my divorce. He was German and was a little taller than me. He had sandy blonde hair and green eyes. He looked and was built nothing like _him_. We had fun for a couple of weeks, but when he wanted to get more serious I could not do it. I could not even bring myself to have him in my home. I felt that it would be wrong to have him in one of _his_ houses. So we ended it as friends. That is how all of my love life was. I knew they all wanted more, but I just didn't have it in me to give my heart away any more. Physical pleasure and company was all I wanted.

One night changed my life forever.

97 years ago I attended the Lords ball as I had the last year, only that year I was Johan's date for the evening. It was glorious and fun. We all drank, danced, and had a ball. I was deposited at the apartment door by Johan, but something in me did not want to stay. Something in me ached to be surrounded by _him _tonight. Johan was staying at the apartment across the way with his nightly entertainment. So I changed from my ball gown and went downstairs. Johan had yelled from his window for me not to have too much fun without him as I got back into his private car and asked the driver to take me home.

We had just driven off when a loud crash came and everything went black. I woke up three nights later to Stellan's and Johan's worried faces. I was starving or thirsty not sure which. They passed me goblet after goblet until I could think straight. It was then I realized what I was. I never wanted to be a vampire. I truly believed that life was not for me. Boy was I wrong.

The first couple of years were the hardest for me. I didn't want this existence I was pissed at my maker for changing me, but I never believed in suicide and I wasn't going to start then. I went through the teachings that my maker gave me, but didn't find any enjoyment in feeding or learning to fight, though I did get a lot of aggression out during Walter and my sparring sessions. I refused to hear what happen to me or why Stellan changed me. I just wanted each night to end so that I could die for the day. I didn't take my vacations to meet with my family cause one; I was afraid I would kill them and two; I didn't know how to tell them what I was now. I could barely accept it how could they. So I made excuses of why I couldn't join them and the yearly Stackhouse gatherings.

Finally, one night after our sparring session Nora and Walter forced me to hear the story of my changing. They were tired of me being mopey and Stellan being worried.

When the car pulled out we were hit by a drunk driver. Johan heard the wreck and rushed to see what had happen. I was mangled and dying. He didn't know what to do so he rushed me to Stellan. I was almost dead so Stellan made the decision to change me. He told them that I was too full of life to have it end. He also figured that since I was once married to a Vampire, loved one, and still had more vampire friends than human friends that I probably had plans to be turned anyway. He truly believed that this was what I wanted. I had never told him otherwise. It was not a discussion I thought I would have to have.

After they explained it to me I felt bad. I understood his reasoning behind it. I had once again let my temper and stubborn streak get in the way of my happiness. I rushed to Stellan and apologized for being so obstinate. That was the night I started calling him Pappa and changed my last name to his, like my other siblings. I also changed my first name to Susannah because Sookie was well-known and why not start out a new life with a new name. It was kinda fun. It took me a while to get used to people calling me by either name, but I got it. I started to once again live life. It wasn't immediate for me. It did take time for me to adjust, but after accepting it that became easier for me. My new family did all they could to make my new life wonderful. Pappa made sure I had everything I needed and wanted. I never really asked for things at first, but he still gave them to me. After a while I just got used to it.

Five years after I was made Pappa felt it was safe to have my family around. So Jason, Michelle and the kids came to visit. He was surprised at my new status, but not unhappy. He figured as long as he still had his sister that was all that mattered. He also told me that he was happy that I would be around to always look out for his family and how many people could say that. Jason had sure grown up a lot. Since there were still many vampires in America that wanted to covet me, no matter what my status, we chose to not tell anyone about my turning. I couldn't really go to America with Pappa cause he had a kingdom to run and none of my siblings particularly liked the states so they didn't want to go. Without their protection it wasn't safe for me to go there and honestly I liked it here. We didn't tell Pam either in case she was forced to tell _him. _Jason allowed us to glamour the whole family into not being able to speak about me other than that I was happy. We agreed that we would get together every so many years either here or the island house, though it was not as fun now that I was a vamp.

We had no issues with other vamps until I was 47 years old. For some reason Bill Compton showed up in Sweden. I had been in Norway with Nora the night he came to check in with Pappa. He claimed he was on vacation and was there for a week to visit an "old friend". Pappa had him followed and discovered he was snooping around my house. The twins wanted to kill him for what he had done to me in the past. They didn't care if he was a visiting regent or not, but it was pointed out that if something where to happen to him it would bring unwanted attention to me. That cooled them down. Of course after talking to him they said that a trip to America was sounding better every day and the stick up his ass would make a perfect stake. Nora and I stayed in Norway until the coast was clear of him. It was then we made the decision to fake my death and send ashes back to Jason. We removed any relics of _his_ from the house as I didn't want them destroyed, but left almost everything of mine. I took the family pictures that could not be replaced. Pappa and Johan came over to help me. It was odd having them there. They were my first and last house guest I ever let come over and they were here to burn the house down.

Jason told me all about the funeral. He informed me how _he_ paid for it and what _he _had put on the headstone. I hadn't really thought about how _he _would take the news until Jason brought it up. I didn't even really consider the fact that I would now be alive when his marriage ended. I still loved him with all my heart and would probably never love another, but did I really want to go there.

Johan and Pappa talked extensively to me about it. They said that love was love and if we could talk it out that might not be a bad thing. Time changes people. They pointed out how much both me and Jason had changed. It didn't hurt to try they said. I was still skeptical because _he_ was 1000 years old why would _he_ change now? Pappa even appealed to Oklahoma to have him released and transferred to Sweden for me. I didn't know he did it until after he was denied, but he tried. I was kinda upset, ok I was pissed that he tried that. I figured that _he_ would have moved on by now. I knew that I was extremely stubborn when it came to us, but towards the end of our marriage _he_ became cold and withdrawn from us. _He_ craved power and _his_ new wife gave him that. Why would he want to leave that for little ole me? That way of thinking made my maker angry. He stated that if the Viking didn't know what I was worth then _he_ was not worthy of me. I decided that we both made many mistakes in our relationship and when _his_ marriage was done if _he_ wanted to see me I would be here and if I didn't get to see _him_ than I would find a way to exist without _him_. I had been doing a good job ignoring the ache so far.

The hardest time for me was when Jason died. I wanted to rush back and attend the funeral. Pappa agreed to go with me, but right before we were to leave one of his grandchildren showed up with a letter for me from Jason. I think I read it a thousand times even though I had it memorized after the second time. It was written in his aged shaky hand:

_My Dear Little Sister,_

_I know that you will probably want to come home once you hear of my death. Don't do it, please. We have always went to great pains to keep your existence hidden from these American vamps and it just wouldn't be right you blowin all that for me. I mean if you were gonna go and do that you should have done it before I died. _

_I am old sissy and my time has come. Michelle is gone and I really can't find a reason to keep holding on. You have hidden from him for so long now it isn't the time for you to meet up with him again and my death won't be the reason for you to. Now I know that you are a stubborn old cow, but do this last thing for me. Wait until the time is right to see him again, a time where you can open your hearts to each other again or you can get all your anger out fight like cats and dogs and be done with it for good._

_I will always love you and remember that you agreed to look after my babies, so make sure you do. I have left it in my will for him to be able to have his land back if he ever asks without question. Since I know you don't be usin it no more. That way if it's meant to be he'll come back._

_Your old fart of a brother_

_Jase_

I honored Jason's wishes and did not return. I did not return for any of their funerals and just mourned them from afar. Walter told me many stories of when his family passed including his children. I couldn't even imagine watching your children grow up and die. Pappa was one of the few makers that let his children check in on their mortal family if they wanted to. Walter was the only one that did.

The yeas passed and the time for _his_ marriage to end was near. When _he_ accepted the invitation by Pappa to join his kingdom it surprised me. Pappa sent me to Denmark with Johan and Walter until the Lords Ball. He said he wanted to get a feeling for the Viking first. They were friends, but I was his dotter. If _he _was still cold towards me Pappa would not let me see him. He refused to have his child hurt in any way.

We received word that I was to return for the Lords Ball in one months' time. I already knew that I was supposed to do that. What I wasn't told is if _he_ was on the guest list. As much as I begged Nora to tell me she just said she was not aware of any changes, whatever that meant. The twins reassured me that it was a good thing. I was a nervous wreck. One hundred years had passed. Things change. _He _could hate me now. _He_ could be angry that I was among the undead and _he_ was not told. _He _could be jealous that he is not my maker or that _he_ had to go all these years thinking I was dead. I just wasn't sure. Walter promised me that he would not leave my side all night unless I asked him to. That he would be my shoulder if I were to need one. It made me feel better, but not by much.

The night I returned for the ball Nora kept me busy with the dress fitting at the beginning of the night. Then Pappa had me sit in on the lords proceedings. They were beyond boring and lasted almost all night. I got the feeling that they were trying to prevent me from wandering around the palace. I doubted I would run into _him _if _he _was even here. I mean wouldn't _he_ stay somewhere else. It had been a month and a half since _he_ came here and _he_ only stayed at the palace when _he_ first got here then _he_ left. When I was finally free of my family I took a stroll were Johan and Nora found me. They told me about their night with _him_ and they loved teasing _him_ about "baby Falk". I hated when they called me that, but knowing that he had a true disdain for newborns it was funny. I laughed as we made our way to our rooms for the day.

Tomorrow night was going to be nerve racking

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**A/N: So what did you think? **** One more chapter after this. Since I am wide awake I might just get it up soon. Show me some love and leave that **


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: The end has come *sniffles* I really liked writing this story I hope you enjoyed reading it. I have to say THANK YOU so much to everyone who read it. All the people that faved, alerted, and took the time to review it. Sorry towards the last couple of chapters I did not respond to the reviews, but I was trying to get the chapters out, but I really do appreciate them all.**

**Disclaimer: Charlaine Harris and Allan Ball own it all not me.**

**So here you go enjoy...**

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**She**

**Chapter 8**

**SPOV**

The Ball was always a fun event, but this time I was nervous. I was very nervous. I was so nervous that I could not even get my fangs to pull up. The family rallied around me trying to calm me. Pappa asked me if he needed to issue a command. That is one thing I loved about him he always asked. Sometimes it was more of a scolding, but still it was always a question. He did the same thing the first time Jason and my family came over just to make sure it was safe, but we learned it was unnecessary. I couldn't calm down so I nodded at him and he issued his command to calm down and to retract my fangs for the next four hours. He figured that was enough time to get me calm on my own.

When the time came for us to be presented I was more than happy for his command. We all stood in the corridor waiting to be announced. First were the different Lords. Each time the door opened I tried to peek and see if _he_ was there. If _he_ was attending I didn't think he would be rude and show up late. The problem was Nora refused to tell me where she sat _him_ and there were over one hundred tables in the ballroom. Ha ha laugh at baby as my eyes dart from table to table. Sometimes my siblings drove me crazy. Right before we were announced I saw _him_. Looking bored and talking to a flirty blonde bimbo sitting beside _him_.

Ok calm gone and jealously over took me. Pappa glanced back at me and shook his head just as they announced him. I put my crazy smile on and prepared to enter the ballroom.

**EPOV**

I arrived at the Ball Just in time for the Lords and royal family to be announced. I figured I would stay long enough to mingle a bit and meet Stellan's newest child. I did not feel like dealing with a yappy baby all night so a quick chat then I would be gone again.

I was seated next to a busty blonde that would not stop trying to garner my attention. I finally decided that maybe if I used sarcasm with her she would shut up. She was too dumb to get it. The lights dimmed and the spotlight came on. The announcer began to speak again. I knew it was time for the royal family.

_Presenting His Majesty King Stellan Falk_

_Princes Johan and Walter Stefansson_

_Princesses Nora Hansson and Susannah Falk_

At first I was still busy trying to derail the talkative blonde when they came through the doors, but then I felt as though somebody was staring holes through the back of my head. I turned to see the royal family just as they passed us. The blonde walking and waving next to Nora must be the "baby Falk" they had all been talking about. Her size and the sway of their hips looked so familiar. Just as they were about to turn so I could see their faces I felt a hand rub against my dick.

I snapped my attention back to the blood bag next to me who was continuing to rub and sucking on a cherry with a sexy smile on her lips. I really did not want to make a scene in the middle of a royal ball so I grabbed her wrist with a slight squeeze, not enough to break it even though I wanted to, and bent over and whispered in her ear.

"If you are going to fuck vampires you should learn the first rule is; do not touch unless told to." I placed her sure to be bruised wrist on the table and rose to join the introduction procession line, leaving the stupid blonde behind.

The problem with being in Sweden is that I was no longer the tallest and seeing the royal family before you approached was impossible. Oh and lucky for me I am the last in line thanks to that stupid bitch. When it was my time to see them I still could not see the youngest around all the people ahead of me. I stopped at the King first of course.

"Ahh…Northman so glad that you agreed to show." He said with a tense smile.

"And with such a lovely date" Johan snapped at me and Walter glared angrily at me. I don't know what the hostility was for. We were fine last night when I left them.

"Trust me when I say that is no date of mine. Blame your sister for sitting me next to that idiot." Instantly the tension faded between us.

It was odd until I got to the girls.

I froze.

My mind was definitely playing tricks on me.

No. It couldn't be, right?

For the last month I had seen her in my head and now here she stood.

I was going crazy for sure.

She stood there fidgeting with her hands and swaying from one foot to the other. The way she did so long ago. Her new "family" started to crowd around her so I did the only thing I could think of…I stormed out.

So much for not making a scene.

I made my way back to my room and paced the floor. How was it possible? Why did they all wait so long to tell me? She told me that she did not want to be turned. What changed? Stellan said they were not lovers, but almost every maker fucks their children. Did he just blatantly lie to me? Questions just kept running through my head. Until the door to my room busted open.

What the fuck?

Walter stood there with the same angry glare he had earlier. He could be quite menacing when he wanted to.

"Northman, you asshole why the fuck did you run? I've known you all my undead life. I never figured you for a coward." He bellowed at me.

I just stood there staring at him. My voice had left me.

"Min lilla syster does not deserve what just happen to her. So if you are going to be a prick then just get your shit and go. Otherwise grab your balls and go talk to her. Do you know how hard this was for her to do? In case you have forgotten you're the one that left her for another woman not the other way around. Did you really expect a beautiful, intelligent, magnificent creature like her to be your mistress? If you did then you are dumber than we all thought and don't deserve her. In my opinion once you failed to fight for her you ceased to deserve her, but she has a loving heart and somehow never stopped loving you." He continued to yell. "You are lucky it is me and not Pappa or Johan that came to search you out because they would have surely found a reason to end your disrespectful ass, even if vår barn would have been mad."

With that last statement he stormed out, slamming the already cracked door behind him.

He was right. I had waited and hoped for 50 years that she would come back so I could at least apologize for the many mistakes I had made. I knew that if she did come back there was no way in hell she would be my mistress, not that I would lower her to that station, and she would probably an old lady anyways, not to say that really mattered to me. I just wanted the chance to be by her side until she left this world. Now here she was and what do I do…

I panic…

I choke…

I ran.

What the fuck was wrong with me?

I took a deep breath and left the room. I started making my way back to the ballroom. I was stopped in the foyer by Johan. When they said they were protective of her they were not kidding.

"I have been instructed to wait for you in case you decided to stop hiding like a rädd spädbarn." It was kind of funny that they switched back and forth between English and Swedish when it came to insults or referring to their sister. "The way you're acting I don't blame her for running from you. You are not worthy." He huffed at me as he led me to one of the libraries. At least his statement made me sure he was not leading me to my death, yet.

As I entered the room I saw her. She was being comforted in the arms of Walter. He was rubbing her hair and shushing her. The door opening caused him to look up at me and stiffen. His petting never stopped.

"Johan did he leave? I don't know what I was thinking. I knew he would not want to see me after all this time." She sobbed never looking up from her brothers chest.

"No little sister the idiot is right here" Johan told her in Swedish. For some reason it surprised me that she understood.

Her head shot up and Walter followed with "and we will be right outside" in a whisper, like I couldn't hear him. Johan nodded in agreement with his brother as they left the room.

We just stood there staring at each other for what seemed like forever.

"Fight, fuck, or do something because the silent suspense is killing us out here." Walter yelled through the door causing her to giggle. It was a sound I never thought I would hear again.

I said the only thing that would seem to come out "I'm so sorry Sookie." It had been almost a hundred years since I had actually spoken her name and not referred to her as _her_ or _she_. It almost sounded foreign coming out of my mouth.

Those four words seemed to relax her. She gave me a weak smile and gestured for me to sit down in one of the chairs and took a seat across from me.

As soon as we sat it was like a dam had bust and I apologized for all the wrong I had did to her. I explained about the resentment I had begun feeling when my maker died and all the rest to her. I didn't know if I would ever be allowed to see her again so I had to get it all out. If she would take me back I would make sure there would never be any unspoken words between us. She sat silently while I told her everything. I told her about what I learned by watching Jason. At the mention of his name her eyes rimmed red a bit, but no tears fell.

After I finished I sat quietly waiting for her reaction. She seemed to be thinking really hard. Her eyebrows still scrunched up and she still bit her lip when she did. It was nice to see she maintained many of her human traits.

"I don't know what you expected of me Eric and I think that is what bothers me the most. I made a lot of mistakes too and expected a lot of things that may not have been fair to you. The problem I have is that you apologized for your mistakes, but what were you expecting me to do. I don't understand what I was supposed to be to you. Maybe we had run our course." She told me. She was right that I did not make it clear what she would be to me when the marriage took place. I didn't even really know for sure myself. I thought about it for a minute.

"I honestly don't know what I expected from you. What I do know that at the time I was too selfish to let you go. I wanted it all; her power and you. What I failed to see was that you were more important than any power that could be offered. I don't know if I would have been forced into the marriage or if I could have found a way out of it. I can honestly say that I was so blinded by misplaced anger, resentment, and jealousy that I didn't even try to fight it. I gave up on us long before you did. I shut down and stopped fighting for what we had. It was the biggest mistake in all my lifetimes and I know if given the chance I will not make those mistakes again. If you are willing to give me another chance I will never, not fight for us again. I don't care if it is now, a year, a decade, a millennium from now that I have to wait for your heart I will and this time I will guard it as the precious thing it is; not break it." I told her. I hoped she would accept it.

She sat in silence again. Searching my eyes for truth. I took in her beauty for the first time tonight. She looked glorious as a vampire. I had so many questions for her, but knew now was not the time to ask. I could only hope we would have some time in the future to learn about the vampiress she had become.

"I have to think of everything you said and get back to you. Will you be around for a while?" she nervously asked

I rose from my seat, took her hand in mine, and kissed it. "Forever" I answered. I straightened and exited the room.

Her brothers entered the room as I left, rushing to her side. I was glad to see she had such a caring family. She had the perfect maker and siblings. Even if she did not let me back into her life I was happy that she had such a wonderful family. I made my way to my room and began unpacking. I had not planned on staying beyond tonight before, but now as long as the King would allow me I would be here for a while.

I was exiting the bathroom after changing and showering when there was a light knock at my door. I sped to open it praying it was not someone to remove me from the palace. She was standing there her eyes racking over my towel clad body. A small shudder went over her right before her eyes reached mine.

"Forever?" she asked with a smile

"Forever" I answered her with a smirk

"You know it might take me that long to forgive you" she said

"And I will work every day to earn it from you" she giggled and walked away.

**The End ...Maybe**

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**A/N: So there you have it. What did you think? I had an idea for an epilogue or maybe a sequel but not too sure. Is there anything you would like to know about them in the future? Let me know and maybe I will be inspired to write it.**


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